The following is a gift. It was shared with me as a "thank you" from my friend of many years and I love her perspective. I asked if I can share it, and she happily agreed. Lisa, you've always made me smile, but with this one, you also made me cry...in the very best way, for the sweetest reason. Thank you!!! --Missy
Lisa St. Pierre is a favorite middle school math teacher to many and an independent, confident, self-proclaimed foodie. She is a wife, a mom, and now a guest blog author. In her spare time she likes to.... oh, right; one year old twins. In her spare time, she likes to go to the bathroom, brush her teeth, and shower! The following are her words.
So, I happen to have a friend in the business and have known about doulas, through her, for years. Although I knew she "helped" people on the day of delivery, I only knew what she did on a very basic, surface level...until I was lucky enough to experience it for myself. Missy offered her services and I awkwardly tried to structure what I thought would be a compromise between receiving help, not hurting her feelings, and not feeling like the situation would be too intimate and/or intrusive for me and my husband. So I basically set up a few hours of help. She could come visit me when I was in the hospital.
Background information: I was going to be a first time mother at 40, with blood clotting issues. I went through IVF and was now having twins --and I still didn't think I needed help. That explains my stubborn resistance to this help, and my lack of openness to new things. I married late and truly, although I envisioned them all my life, I thought that children were out of the picture for me. This was a very special day that I knew in my heart would only happen once. I wanted to preserve it and felt pressure to make all the right decisions to make it special.
I went though 24 hours of (luckily) painless labor with my birthing plan switching from a vaginal birth to a Cesarean section. Missy did all she could to help me when both plans were in place, and her presence and experience made the transition seem and feel OK.
Missy gave me emotional gifts that only her services could while I concentrated on my body and its needs (with her support and wisdom). She freed my exhausted and supportive husband to be able to stay in contact with both sets of our parents in the waiting room and with family members who were desperate for phone updates. He had the gift of not feeling torn because he wasn't tending to me. He got to rest, eat, and even play euchre with them!
So take it from someone who thought having a doula was for "those" people; for the elite, the overly worried, the incredibly natural. Shut that voice off! We are all "those" people. Those who deserve to receive that love and support from someone who is experienced, who will make an already special day exponentially MORE SPECIAL.
Allow her wisdom and experience to relax you, inform you, comfort you, and help you create positive memories for you and your family.